Change your mindset, change your love life 💕
Did you know your mindset can be what holds you back the most in your love life?
If all you ever think is that you're "broken" or "too emotional" or "too needy," you're never going to thrive. What's worse is that the people you date will sense that anxious energy rather than getting to know the real you.
And I don’t say this on my high horse. I was MEAN to myself back when I was single (and even in relationships).
I remember thinking that, somehow, my mind was broken because of how much I would overthink simple things like someone’s body language or goodnight text.
So what's the biggest mindset shift you can make as an anxious dater?
Well, it's simple: your anxiety can teach you a lot.
The season finale of my dating show, Let’s Date, is happening tonight!
My friend and fellow coach, Ali Ringer, is joining me to talk about toxic dating cycles and how to break them.
The show starts at 5:30 pm PST, but you can register below to have a reminder emailed to you, so you don’t miss it!
Come hang with us, learn about toxic dating, and ask your questions!
Most of the time, people feel anxious when dating because they're not listening to their instincts, and they’re suppressing parts of themselves that want to be loved.
Instead of creating boundaries, they let people walk all over them.
Instead of asking for their needs, they silently suffer.
Instead of sending that “I had a great time” text that they keep thinking about, they don't.
Instead of defining the relationship themselves, they wait for the other person to do it.
All of that fuels your dating anxiety even more.
The answer isn't to try to act "chill" or like you don't have feelings and needs.
You have to use those anxious moments as a sign to honor what's making you anxious. You have to remember that you're not "too much.” You've just been dating in a way that makes you think you are.
Shift all that shame, embarrassment, and guilt to becoming more curious about what your anxious thoughts are trying to tell you.
Ask yourself: What do I need at this moment?
Or, better yet: What am I scared to express right now? What part of myself am I trying to hide?
Listening to what your anxiety is trying to tell you, rather than ignoring it, is the mindset that can lead you to a more secure love life.
With that said: if you're overthinking sending a text message right now, send that text!
Until next week!
All the love,
Kirstie
My Links:
If you want to feel more secure in your love life, check out my Anxious Attachment Workshop.
Did you know I wrote a book about love? Grab your copy here.
Check out my live dating show every Thursday at 5:30 pm PST!
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Is Sex Not A Priority In Your Relationship? You’re Not Alone!
Podcast: The First Long Distance One
Secrets To Styling Your Online Profile (With Alyssa Dinner)
17 Relationship Red Flags You Should Never Ignore, According to Therapists
Why are we still glamourising toxic relationships?
This is Dating: Love Letters: Manny
Is an Ultimatum Ever a Good Idea? Here’s What Relationship Experts Have To Say
Hi! I’m Kirstie
I help anxious people who don’t feel good enough for love understand their worth and find fulfilling love.
For over a decade, I was in one relationship after another with people who mistreated me or were emotionally unavailable. All of that ended when I took a year break from dating and read a book called Attached.
Learning about attachment styles changed my life. It opened doors like discovering my lack of boundaries and inability to ask for my needs to be met.
Today, I write and coach to help people through the same journey. You don’t have to feel so anxious, insecure, and uncertain when it comes to love.
I want to help you feel confident and find the love you deserve.
Want to learn more about working with me? Book a discovery call.
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